I’ve got a prompt sitting in my unused prompts folder that’s actually one I’d done before (and was sent out again), asking me to check in on the condition of my heart. Last time I wrote about my heart as… Read moreRevisiting the condition of my heart

Tragedy. Acceptance. Grief. Pain. Love. I know some people want to ask “Why?” when tragedy happens. I’m not talking about culpability for events surrounding the tragedy (if there is culpability to be found), but rather the bigger picture existential question…. Read moreBigger Questions

In the words of our friend, Joey Tribbiani, “It is a love based on giving and receiving as well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and… Read moreGiving and Receiving

Learning to love differently is hard. When George died, when Sara died, my love for them did not go away. Before, I knew how to express my love: talking to George as I was lying in bed in the eveninglaying… Read moreLearning to Love Differently

A word after a word after a word is power, according to Margaret Atwood. Is that really true? A word after a word after a word. Do the thousands of words that I have typed since Sara died give me… Read morea word after a word after a word

I am my heart’s undertaker. It is a full time job. Before, I never really thought about how often a heart could break, about what work it was to tend to a heart that has been mangled. I watch Shifu… Read moreMy Heart’s Undertaker

though sometimes it is necessaryto reteach a thing its loveliness from “St. Francis and the Sow” by Galway Kinnell The quote above reminds me so much of Sara. She was so, so lovely. She was also always so hard on… Read moreLoveliness

In our day to day lives, we often use common platitudes to muster up strength to get through challenging situations. Almost everyone I know does it at times… What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. God (or the universe) will… Read more“What Doesn’t Kill You…”

So many people have told me that I’m doing so well. But that makes me uncomfortable and feels wrong. I’m not well. I’m not okay. I still cry every day. Yes, I’m functioning – I have to. I have no… Read moreChoosing Love

Wrapped up in grief like a blanket in the dark,life right now feels so wrong.But even in the dark we can find strength. I’m not here to share platitudes about a greater purposeor predestination or God’s will – I know… Read moreOf Grief and Liquefied Caterpillars

To myself – my past self, my present self, and my future self: Try to remember to see yourself the way that Sara did, through her beautiful, goofy, love-filled gaze.To her, you were perfect; it always made you uncomfortable when… Read morePrompt 30: Self Blessing

Today has been a rough day, for no good reason other than the fact that I miss you terribly. Three whole months have passed since your death, and I feel like it is just now sinking in that I will… Read morePrompt 28: The shape of you

Text version, to go with image above – cut out words arranged on a dark brown & shimmery light brown mosaic tile background. I’m so angry that Sara and George were taken from me. I don’t understand it. I don’t… Read morePrompt 26: Words Revisited

I hear and read things about healing from loss a lot these days. At first, just the thought of “healing” my broken heart made me angry. How would I ever heal? This wasn’t something that could be fixed – Sara… Read morePrompt 25: Don’t Think, Just Write

Grief comes in waves. I’m 3 months out – tomorrow, actually, is the 3 month anniversary of Sara’s death. I’m 5 1/2 months out from George’s death. At first, after loss, the waves were high and strong and frequent. I… Read morePrompt 24: Centered Moments

This is really hard, being here without you. Getting through life without you – grieving our son without you, and trying to figure out what comes next, without you. Sometimes I need to just imagine you here with me, imagine… Read morePrompt 23: How you would love me

At the end of my suffering, there was a door. I did not want to go.Even after I could no longer speakor open my eyesI held on for over a day,anchored by the love surrounding me.I did not want to… Read morePrompt 22: A Message To Me

Keys and mailPlaced gently on the dining table;The sound of metal on woodCatches my attentionAnd my mind gets caught up in a wave.I remember buying that table,Our first significant purchase for our home.The mosaic in the center – Eye catching,we… Read morePrompt 21: Mosaic