Of Steps and Stars

One step in front of the other
winter crispness in the air
a breeze that swirls
alternating between a whisper and a shove

With every step
I feel your name surfacing
like a chant or an echo bouching in my mind
sacred, evoking both smiles and tears

The impact of each step vibrates up my leg
sometimes walking provides a distraction
but I know that I could walk one thousand miles
and the grief would still be there

*Step* – I love you
*Step* – I miss you
*Step* – How am I supposed to do this
for the rest of my life?

Glancing skyward
I see the one constellation I can always recognize
Orion, with a belted waist
and arms and legs extending to the heavens

I am jealous of a constellation
I don’t know where you are, if you are
or what really happens when our bodies die
but it feels like Orion is closer to you than I am

Then I take another step, and another
and I consider that maybe
you haven’t gone far at all
Just maybe

Your kisses could be in that breeze
that blows past my cold cheeks
and your hugs in the molecules of sunshine
that stream in the windows during the day

More steps back toward the house
I nod toward Orion and ask him
to twinkle for you
if he wouldn’t mind

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