Weekends have been getting harder. Yesterday was the 15th Saturday since Sara died…15 weeks, 15 weekends. She and I were never particularly ambitious with our weekends – we watched tv, played games, snuggled, read, sometimes went out to eat, took care of things around the house… but whatever we did was enjoyable because we were together. Now things just feel dull. It’s harder to stay engaged with whatever I’m doing. I’ve always been a homebody; even before Sara, I spent most weekends at home. But Sara being in my life changed me; nothing is the same without her, not even something as mundane as relaxing on the weekends.
I miss her. I miss me with her. I miss us. I miss our life. Nothing about this is fair or right or ok.
